“We may not have it all together, but together we have it all”
I saw this quote somewhere but I don’t remember where. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ajyu0Zue0FA
I’m worried for me and Darion. Things have been said and everything we have is in danger and I don’t want anything bad to happen. I’ve never felt this way before about anybody. I don’t want to sound obsessive, but its like I never realized I was missing anything until now, because when I’m with him it feels like I have everything I need. Its hard letting him leave, even when I know I will see him tomorrow. I was afraid to let myself get attached because I’m still unsure of everything, but its too late. I’m attached and afraid because things that are attached have a tendency of being broken apart, and I don’t want that to happen.
Tomorrow he’s planning on talking to my dad to try to set everything straight and I’m afraid. What if my dad doesn’t believe what he says? Or what if something bad comes out and it makes things worse? And there’s this little thing in the back of my mind, wondering if the things that they are saying is true.. Its their word against his and I think they are wrong, I trust him. The worst thing I could imagine is learning that I trusted the wrong person.
Its crazy that he even wants to talk to my dad about everything and I’m hoping for the best, but I’m still worried about losing anything that we have right now.
As always, thanks for reading lovelies! I will see your sexy faces next time 🙂
Not being able to know what you want is pretty awkward. And it’s more than when you’re at a friend’s house and they are like “Hey, since you are the guest, what do you want for supper?” And then you just stand there like a deer in head lights because, well how are you supposed to know what to eat? Maybe it’s just a trait of those of us that over think everything, but I am definitely indecisive and I never know what I want. Especially when it comes to boys.
It’s been proven that women are more likely to find a man attractive if they resemble their father either in physical appearance or personality. At first it didn’t seem that strange, I mean, a girl can see all the good things in their father and feel safe and comfortable around them, so what’s surprising about liking that? But then I realized how the people I obsess over are exactly like my dad. Yes, as awkward as it may be, I’ve found myself falling in love with my dad’s mini-me… twice.
These two boys, Daniel and Taylor, are so much like my dad that I would think he was reincarnated if he weren’t still alive. Whether it’s style, music, or hobbies, they are eerily alike. I always wonder if they would have been best friends if they knew my dad growing up. Daniel is literally the same exact person as my dad, and I had a crush on Daniel for as long as I have known him. I don’t even know if I still do because it changes so much. I get jealous when he has girlfriends, I get excited when he talks to me, it’s pathetic really. Especially because I know so much about him- including the fact that he’s pretty much a bad boy. Plus, he’s so much like my dad, even his childhood and family relationships resembles my dad’s. Then there’s Taylor, who I know close to nothing about besides the fact that he’s going to prom with Kayla, the sporty “my dad’s a cop” full of herself preppy girl. And that he has an awkward way of flirting, but he likes me and that’s nice. And there’s a really awkward rumor about him. But he’s kind of cute and really sweet and I really, really like his eyes. And I think that I like him, but every day I wonder if I actually do or if I just like the feeling of being liked. But he’s so different from Daniel, yet I’m noticing that he is more and more like my dad every day.
I was going to list every single thing they have in common with my dad, but the list is seriously really long, especially Daniel’s list, since I don’t know a lot about Taylor…yet. But do I really want to know him? I don’t know. I don’t know anything about how I feel right now except that I have learned that I like people who have things in common with my dad. But I spend so much time figuring out how I feel that by the time I know one thing, it’s changed. I know that I just need to stop overthinking my feelings, or overanalyzing people to figure out if I should like them, but I guess that’s just part of being me.
It’s just really awkward to find out that you like people who are like your parents. And it’s really awkward to over think things so much that you don’t even know how to feel anymore. I change my mind about who I love every day, and my heart and head are always battling. Logic and Love do not fit together.
Thanks, as always, for being the sexy bloggers that you are and reading my posts. I know that I haven’t blogged in a really long time, and I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I haven’t felt like writing in a while. I will try to work on that… For those of you who really, really care about how strangely similar to my dad they (more specifically Daniel, since I actually know a lot about him) are, here’s a quick list. (Which if you don’t, feel free to leave. Don’t worry, I understand.)So here’s the list. Just for funsies.
Complicated paternal relationships
Relationships with all the wrong girls
Hole-y jeans and wifebeater t-shirts
Hobbies: Looking at, collecting, fixing, or chasing down cars, bikes, and weather
Ditching highschool to be a mechanic or a mechanical engineer or a some sort of fix-it-upper guy.
Really smart and can do puzzles and math, but only if he will actually use it
Can draw, but only if he feels like it or has some reason to.
Cares about his future and what people think, but pretends not to.
Tough and muscly on the outside, but actually vulnerable on the inside
Takes a lot to get him to say how he feels, but when he does you know he cares a lot.
He’s really passionate about what he loves, but hides it from people until he knows you are trustworthy.
It takes a lot to earn this trust, and is actually really easy to hurt him even though he pretends to brush it off like it doesn’t matter.
Longer hair that always seems to be in the state of needing a haircut
Really pretty eyes (Though I don’t really admire my dad’s that much…)
Mostly his hobbies and the way he acts with people are what really get to me for being so alike.
His personality, his likes and dislikes, his style in clothing, his sense of humor, the way he acts around certain people, even his posture… It’s so strange that they are so alike. I can practically predict the exact thing he’s about to say or do, what he’s thinking or feeling, just because I know my dad. The only thing is, I over think things so much that I can’t decide if knowing so much and practically being able to tell his future is a good thing or a bad thing. It’s cool to know so much about him, but I also pretty much know what he’s going to turn out to be like, and all the “cons” that could be in a relationship with him.
A Word About My Life 